The intention I held for becoming a Realtor was two sided, Firstly, I wanted to get my own property and secondly, I wanted to help people change their lives as well. The other determining factor is my location lacking opportunity ifor employment and the necessity of needing control over my schedule as a single mother.
My first task after getting the California Real Estate Sales Associate license, was putting myself through the Short Sale and Foreclosure Resource Realtor with the National Association and my career began. I signed on with a Broker I respected as a woman owned business who I knew of through local friendships.
As an INFJ personality type, navigating the real estate industry has been both a rewarding and challenging journey. INFJs, often described as empathetic visionaries, bring a unique blend of strengths and vulnerabilities to the fast-paced world of real estate. In this article, I’ll share my perspective on how being an INFJ has shaped my experience in this field, highlighting both the advantages and the hurdles of having this personality type in the industry.
The Pros of Being an INFJ in Real Estate
1. Deep Empathy for Clients
One of the defining traits of INFJs is our deep sense of empathy, this is experienced for myself repeatedly. We understand people’s needs, often intuiting what they want even when they struggle to articulate it themselves. This ability to connect on a personal level has been invaluable in real estate. Whether I’m working with a first-time homebuyer who’s overwhelmed or a seller navigating a significant life transition, I’m able to provide support that feels both genuine and tailored.
2. Meeting Amazing People
There are so many people who are interested in buying and selling real estate all with different stories. If you want to be inspired by a variety of ways in people make money, a diverse selection of cultures, beautiful families and all around a far more expansive range of people than you would normally ever meet, this is a great business. I have some clients, only a few I keeping touch with and am lucky to know. I now have arranged my finances differently after learning from clients, been inspired to start a side business, shared amazing gifts, shared in joy with their business developments and learned new ways of thinking. This is all thanks to real estate transactions.
Long-Term Vision
INFJs are known for our strategic thinking and long-term vision. In real estate, this translates into helping clients see the bigger picture. For example, I’m able to guide clients toward properties that align not just with their current needs but also with their future aspirations, such as raising a family or building wealth through investment. There are many ways to make money in real estate and expand.
3. Commitment to Integrity
Authenticity and integrity are core to who I am. In an industry where trust is paramount, these values resonate deeply with clients. My commitment to being transparent and doing what’s best for my clients—even if it means walking away from a potential deal—has helped me build strong, lasting relationships. Knowing there is always enough to go around and have a connection to the village I live in adopting this "the mountain will heal them" or "these folks are far reaching and let them go" approach has allowed me to step aside when needed.
4. Creative Expression
The endless marketing and branding in this business is fun. I have been able to adopt a general theme of spreading education, exciting sharing the mountain lifestyle and local events, even sharing some of my personal property projects with the public in hopes to inspire other to realize they can do the same. The platforms and gadgets I've learned to use to run the business and lead generate is exciting exploration of solution based tools.
5. Creative Problem-Solving
As an INFJ, I thrive on finding creative solutions to challenges. Whether it’s negotiating a tricky deal or helping a client reimagine how a space could meet their needs, this ability has been a major asset in my career. It’s incredibly satisfying to turn what seems like an impossible situation into a success story and fin those win-win's for all parties. To establish a contract which benefits everyone is satisfying, a source of pride.
The Cons of Being an INFJ in Real Estate
1. Emotional Drain
While empathy is a strength, it can also be draining. Real estate transactions are often emotionally charged, and as an INFJ, I tend to absorb the stress and emotions of my clients. There have been times when I’ve struggled to set boundaries, leaving me feeling depleted after particularly intense transactions. Being exposed to coworkers with unethical behaviors, and having to work with agents who are extremely sales focused on the other end can get annoying. Not knowing who to trust in the office, because agents will take your clients and some clients are very unstable. There is also the part where we do have a life that comes first, so, to lose clients after dedicating years to the home search or to meet with sellers several times to have them decide not to sell becomes very draining.
2. Perfectionism
My idealistic nature can sometimes work against me. I have high expectations for myself and for the quality of service I provide, which can lead to overworking and a constant drive to “get it just right.” While this dedication is appreciated by clients, it’s not always sustainable for my well-being and not always agreed with on the other side. Also, keep in mind the learning never stops. Contracts change with the state, laws change, county has updates, the market is never still, and there is a never-ending variety of personalities in the deals. This is not working consistently with the same people or circumstances. Being caught off guard with updates can make providing exceptional service tricky.
3. Aversion to Conflict
Negotiation is a critical part of real estate, but as an INFJ, I often find conflict uncomfortable. I’ve had to work hard to develop assertiveness and to see conflict not as a personal attack but as an opportunity to advocate for my clients. Accepting early on 90% of your clients do not care about you. A select few will talk not only about the property they bought and sold to their group of people and also mention their Realtor. To be a mediator with folks you know are temporary in your world can at times comes across as being a sounding board with no guarantee of close (pay). To clearly see a win-win negotiation and be surrounded by combative or hesitant people making the biggest decision of their life takes a toll on the ability to detach when you are expected to find their solution and make it a fit. You will be exposed to the worst versions of some people quickly, and it has nothing to do with you.
4. Wanting Appreciation
Appreciation is a funny thing, I stay up to date with the market, changing laws, have takes several additional classes and gather needed certificates to feel confident in my services and getting a good review can be like pulling teeth at times. Dedicating countless hours to buyers to have them walk away, just ghosting. The accommodation to clients can be intense with no guarantee of pay. For myself, I have a desire to be acknowledged for my contributions and services, if that is your aim the sooner to realize that is not the name of this game, the better for you. You can be the first agent a person sees with not closing under your belt and they look no further. There are brokers doing this for 40 years not getting deals, I struggle with that concept of knowing I played a major role in someone's life and the bond is extremely short lived.
Long term Vision
As I have been told many times, I live with one foot in the future. I see coworkers in senior citizen bracket still showing properties on Sunday and from my first year in real estate I visioned getting my broker license and not staying in that position. My long term vision for acquiring my own property and helping other learn to do the same existed years before I acquired a license to sell. I am a visionary, I take the steps to accel, my transparency around future ambitions and creative solutions can offend others with their tried-n-true methods. My ability to identify improvements to systems becomes threatening or as if I am a competition to my own people, when I never intended that. I try new things with marketing to compete with the future of the industry. If you see and are pulled forward by future goals keep it to yourself, build connections in the background, do not speak of your ideas until you are taking the action to implement them. My caring nature assumed others would see the forward moving momentum and collaborate, not in this industry. You need capital and the ability to be cut-throat and not think twice about it to build an empire in this business.
Limited Energy
Real estate is a relationship-driven industry, and networking is key. However, as a true introvert, I’ve found it challenging to maintain the energy required for constant socializing and self-promotion. There is a constant need to nurturing leads, staying up to date with your SOI, advertising value and learning new lending products to suit their needs. This is mostly energy spent with a delayed gratification factor. Honestly, I get tired of seeing myself on the internet.
Limited energy becomes prevalent for me when I have a challenge at home with a child, am remodeling, hosting holidays, and still have to serve eviction notices to problem makers while negotiating repairs. The industry is demanding as most professions are, always be professional, always be on, always know the answers. This is in comparison to folks I know who naturally are more social people. I work to be able to stop working and do nothing now instead of working to go and do more stuff which would be fun, the off becomes more important than I have ever known it to be in my world.
Finding Balance as an INFJ in Real Estate
Over time, I’ve discovered strategies to harness the strengths of my INFJ personality while mitigating the challenges. Here are a few that have worked for me:
Setting Boundaries: Learning to protect my energy has been crucial. I’ve become more intentional about scheduling downtime and separating work from personal life. Take this statement to heart, your clients do not need to know who you are, you need to know who they are, why they are needing services, and when they need you. You're not making friends, after 30 days you may never speak to them again, this is being done to get paid *not for free.. One of the most necessary lessons in boundaries is also knowing you can fire clients and refuse service, let them go elsewhere or refer them out.
Embracing Assertiveness: I’ve honed my negotiation skills and reframed conflict as a necessary part of the process. With practice, I’ve grown more confident in advocating for my clients without sacrificing my values, even when they differ. There are clues to pick up on with their flexibility levels. Every negotiation is different, every single time. I am the one who has dedicated to learning, I know the minimum requirements to close, and I am responsible to staying on schedule with the transaction, while they manage their emotions. Sign here, thank you, and moving forward. This or that, now choose and done.
Leveraging Technology: To manage the demands of networking, I’ve embraced social media, providing valueable resources, and other digital tools that allow me to connect with a wider audience while staying true to my authentic self. What people do not mention the price on the tools vary and research is necessary. If you are an INFJ and considering Real Estate you need a CRM and a digital footprint in this age. While technology cannot replace in persons, it does allow you space to recoup.
Building a Support System: Surrounding myself with a supportive team and mentors has been invaluable. They provide encouragement, share wisdom, and help me navigate the complexities of the industry. The Sphere of influence I've formed is the most amazing service providers and business owners on the hill, their expertise is such a gift in my life and you will need a steady support system. You need this to balance the yuckiness.
Understanding my personality is a result my journey taking this path, alongside a fantastic therapist providing insights over the years. If you are familiar and relate to INFJ and are considering real estate as a career I am so glad you are here. Being an INFJ in the real estate industry is a double-edged sword. Empathy has been a guide for negotiations, long term visions for clients are easy to grasp, and commitment to integrity and education have enabled me to make a meaningful impact, but I’ve also had to contend with emotional exhaustion, cut--throat behaviors, and the challenges of being an introvert in a highly social competitive profession. I’ve found a way to thrive while staying true to who I am. For any fellow INFJs considering a career in real estate, know that your unique perspective and abilities can be your greatest assets—as long as you’re mindful of your boundaries and needs. If you approach this with the need for meaningful connections, I would reconsider and prepare yourself to fully separate professional and personal life before beginning. I will also add If you are looking to acquire your own property or rentals, you can do what no other agent would be willing to do for yourself, go for it. The payoff in securing your future is there.
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